“Becoming Korean Family in America”
Praise Presbyterian Church
Somerset, NJ
By Linda Kwak

The prayer meeting for PEM, the “Praise English Ministry” of Praise Presbyterian Church, a predominantly Korean congregation, began with people slowly trickling in on Zoom and exchanging small talk and pleasantries. Everyone was very familiar with each other, the atmosphere was very casual, and the group size was around ten people. The appointed leader for the night, Grace Lee, officially began the event by sharing a PowerPoint on the Zoom platform and opening with a prayer. In her prayer, she powerfully asked God to join us and the Holy Spirit to lead us so that we become “kingdom minded.” I was moved not only by her language but her strong voice. After the prayer, she informed us that we would be going by the usual format, which is to spend 14 to 20 minutes on devotion and then the remainder of the time on prayer requests and prayer reports. Grace then went over the devotional that she had prepared, which was centered around the verse John 14:27, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you,” and the song lyrics, “peace, bring it all to peace, let it break, at Your name” from “Tremble” by Mosaic MSC, a popular contemporary worship song that I also enjoy. She then highlighted the words, “Your name” and discussed how it is in God’s name that we are given authority, and then we began our individual time of prayer. Everyone else had their cameras off, but I could see Grace meditating and Pastor Don Lee praising. It seems to me that they were still leading by example, even in this online space.

After we returned, Grace’s voice was trembling with emotion as she emphasized how we are all brothers and sisters, and God just wants to be our father. She then led us to the next segment, “Engage,” during which she asked everyone to unmute. Everyone was praying or praising as a solitary activity, but they were all vocalizing together. I recognize this style of prayer as 통성기도 (tongsungkido), which is usually identified as a Korean style of prayer in which people cry out together. It was a powerful moment in which I saw congregants’ emotions on Zoom as they cried out to God. Even on Zoom, I was able to pick up the words, “Father,” “God,” and “authority.”

The next segment, “Requests,” was the most impactful experience of the event. I found this segment so powerful because I was amazed that people were able to be so vulnerable and emotionally immersed despite both being on Zoom and having a stranger present and observing the event. I was moved by their honest display of emotion, and I appreciated how open they were with their prayer requests, sharing deeply personal struggles. I felt God’s presence in the interactions between the members at the prayer meeting, and I was touched that this was a space that the members can actually find peace. I also loved that they took the time to go over everyone’s requests and prayed for each individual that shared. This showed me how intentionally every member is cared for by the others.

There are elements that stood out to me while observing the prayer meeting that I believe are essential to what makes up Praise Presbyterian Church’s ecclesial imagination. The first is how the leadership team leads with example and is not afraid to be vulnerable and transparent. The second is how the language used by the members demonstrates how they sincerely view each other as a family. This particularly comes through with the consistent use of their moniker “PEMily,” which is a play on the words “family” and “PEM,” as well as their references to each other as “brothers and sisters.” The third is how much they care for one another and how this care manifests through their actions. The fourth and final aspect is how integral worship is to the ministry and how corporate worship unifies the congregation. As I continued to observe Praise Presbyterian Church, my research further reinforced the idea that these very elements are what fuel Praise Presbyterian Church’s ecclesial model.

Praise Presbyterian Church consists of both a Korean Ministry (KM) and an English Ministry (PEM) in Somerset, New Jersey. The major difference between KM and PEM is in the demographic of their ministries and how they cater to their members. To accommodate their members, which are predominantly older Korean immigrants, the service for the Korean adult ministry at Praise Presbyterian Church is made for Koreans from start to finish. The worship is sung in Korean, the prayers are in Korean, every spoken element is in Korean, and the Scripture is read in Korean. During the sermon, the pastor includes elements about the Korean culture that are relatable for many Koreans and Korean Americans, and interestingly enough, I find these generalizations more accessible and agreeable than alienating since having these shared attributes serves as a reminder that everyone has a cultural identity and community. They create spaces to meet cultural needs, such as socializing after service to provide social comfort for their congregation that they might not get outside of church. PEM’s demographic breakdown, however, is quite different. By age, PEM is almost an even split of 1/3 college students, 1/3 young adults, 1/3 families. Racially, the demographic of PEM is around 60% Korean, 30% Chinese, and 10% Filipino or other Pan-Asian ethnicities. Compared to other English ministries in Korean churches, this would be considered racially diverse. Among the Korean members of PEM, there are a lot of students that feel displaced from their family after graduating college. They’re not really first generation, but they also don’t belong to the world of the second generations, so they’re stuck in this in-between limbo phase. PEM recognizes that church shouldn’t only be for Koreans, and there is a desire for more diversity at their church. Currently, the ministry as a whole is not actively seeking ways to increase diversity, but Pastor Danny, the lead pastor for Emmaus, the college ministry, is putting effort into making Emmaus more diverse.

Both KM and PEM have a system of small groups that allow for the members to feel more connected as a family. In KM they’re called Sarangbang (Love Room), and in PEM, they’re called House Churches, and they are groups of six to ten people that meet once a week. From my experience, in a large church setting, small group environments are the best ways for people to feel connected. Thus, PEM really focuses on getting new members into House Churches, and once people join, they feel like they can actually become a family because of the intimate time they share together. House Churches are modeled after the early churches, where small groups were brought together to build the body of Christ. Thus, one of the major points of House Churches is to bring non-believers, or those that don’t know Christ, into an environment that is welcoming, warm, and friendly. It’s not about forcing beliefs, and it’s more than just a Bible study. It’s about having a place where people can eat, talk, and share their lives with each other. House Churches are also encouraged to participate in outreach or charities together. For example, one member’s House Church rallied around autism and participated in community walks and 5K’s. The House Church model at PEM serves to exemplify the vision of their ministry: “We want to be a family that loves God, loves each other, and loves the world.”

When I first got a chance to speak with Pastor Don Lee, the head pastor of PEM, what stood out to me in our conversation was when he spoke about Reverend Bong Ki Huh, the head pastor of Praise Presbyterian Church, and how he is known for being non-traditional. Reverend Huh came to Praise Presbyterian Church around 20 years ago, and he grew the church from a membership of 200 to what is now around 1,500, including PEM. What shocked me was when Pastor Don listed things that Reverend Huh removed which I recognize to be traditionally essential to Korean churches. He removed the title of deacons and elders, so even if they have those roles and positions, they are to be referred to as 형제님(hyungjaenim) and 자메님 (jamaenim), which are formal ways of referring to each other as brothers or sisters. The titles of deacon and elder are highly revered in Korean churches as markers of esteem and the church equivalent of social statuses. The titles are revered to the point where I know of many people who will never leave their church despite conflicts because of all that they did to earn those titles and now they don’t want to lose them. Yet, it is specifically because of this sense of reverence and pride that Reverend Huh took the titles away, and I was blown away not only because he thought to do so, but that he was able to accomplish it. Reverend Huh also took away Wednesday and Friday night services, which are commonly found in Korean churches. He also removed crosses from inside and outside the building so that nonbelievers would not be made uncomfortable. He also got rid of the Korean church tradition of putting fresh flowers at the feet of the pulpit every Sunday so that people wouldn’t be distracted by the task and the visual during the actual worship. Pastor Don also mentioned how the way that Reverend Huh preaches is not typical of Korean pastors. This is something that I noticed as well while observing one of the Korean services. During our interview, Pastor Jong Dae Lee also echoed these sentiments about Reverend Huh and added that typically in Korean churches, the senior pastor has absolute rule and power, but Reverend Huh really works closely with the session. This provides stability. Pastor Jong Dae Lee further shared, “Session has yet to ever oppose anything that Reverend Huh wants to do. […] He has yet to have any decisions made where it wasn’t unanimously approved.” This is because he advocates for the session and shields them from criticisms, and he also has many unofficial, one-on-one meetings with the members of session in order to build consensus ahead of time, allowing the church to always come out with a united front. He also has a lot of leverage because of how he grew the church when he came 20 years ago. Reverend Huh encourages the leaders to think outside the box. He leads by example and gives the associate pastors a lot of freedom. This freedom from office hours and progress reports has motivated the pastors to work harder.

The unconventional and bold leadership style that Pastor Don attributed to Reverend Huh was confirmed by the members of PEM. Pastor Jong Dae Lee said that the leaders of PEM trust Pastor Don to be the shield that will protect them so that they can make decisions without being driven by fear of retribution or consequences. Pastor Don also encourages members to share ideas, be involved, and help contribute so that they can take ownership and lead. He is described as being approachable, non-threatening, and not intimidating, with a lot of wisdom. Because of how approachable he is, there is more opportunity for transparency between the leadership and the congregation since members aren’t afraid to give feedback.

Unlike typical Korean churches, there is a lack of hierarchy. This means that congregants can talk to the pastors like friends. There is also no deference based on titles, which I noticed when hearing the members casually referring to the pastors by only adding “P” before their first name. In the Korean culture, the hierarchical gap between the pastor and congregational members is huge, and as one member put it, you often have to “눈치봐” (noonchibwa). This term can be translated as having tact or common sense in a way that means you have to remain constantly aware, and it’s usually the state that members have to be in when in the presence of elders and leaders. PEM does not have such an atmosphere, and thus the members feel comfortable sharing or even complaining. However, while Reverend Huh will listen without judgement, he will still share his wisdom and say things to you directly. This direct and bold manner of speaking also came through during his preaching during the Sunday service that I observed. I appreciated how honest and open he was.

There are many other aspects that I found to be unconventional compared to traditional Korean churches. In addition to the unique leadership styles, both Reverend Huh and Pastor Don are happy to share preaching time with other pastors. Usually, head pastors of Korean congregations do not share the pulpit often, but PPC’s system works in their favor since the congregation members are happy to hear different pastors speak. It is interesting to me that both the Korean Ministry (KM) and PEM defy what is traditionally found at Korean churches, since typically the Korean ministry remains more traditional and the English ministry tends to go against traditions. These tendencies often lead to fissures between the two congregations in Korean immigrant churches. I believe that PPC is able to avoid such a divide because of how intentional the PEM leaders are about following and honoring KM’s position and wishes. Pastor Don shared their line of thinking, “If we’re the Joshua generation, how do we be faithful to the Moses generation?” Therefore, even though on a congregational level there is little interaction between the KM and PEM outside of sharing a building, they clearly collaborate at the leadership level.

At the session level, the leaders of PEM speak to the senior pastor to discuss and work together on a variety of things. However, they do still have difficulties because the second generation looks to the first generation as being old and antiquated, and the first generation looks to the second generation as being young and immature. Furthermore, there is previous hurt at PPC from an incident eight years ago where the English ministry at that time broke away from PPC without warning to form their own church, Graceway. Because of this, one of the conditions given to Pastor Don when he came to PPC was that he had to promise to never take the English ministry and create an independent church. In order to recuperate from this history, PEM seems to be more intentional about respecting and following KM’s lead, and they have led efforts to hold joint events where both ministries come together to make kimchi. PEM has also modeled being present within the neighboring community for KM as well.

PEM has experienced tremendous growth in the past couple years, growing from 15 people to 200. This growth was welcomed, but it also brought challenges. They have had to constantly move meeting locations and even service times, for Sunday worship in order to accommodate their growing numbers. They have also had to restructure their leadership model so that it works for a church size of 200. Furthermore, there was a concern that as the ministry grows bigger, they might lose the identity of PEMily. This concern, although alleviated in part by House Groups, was exacerbated when the pandemic hit since it became increasingly difficult to reach out to those members that have been on the fringes of the ministry. Not being able to meet in person has been one of the biggest struggles for members of PEM, especially for a ministry where a huge part of their fellowship is socializing in person. However, members believe that the pandemic has also brought to light how great PEM is at helping and loving one another. There were many incidents of people stepping up to alert each other about local stores restocking necessities, members volunteering so quickly to provide food for the worship team that there were no spots left on the sign-up sheet, and people reaching out to those that needed emotional or spiritual help.

The giving nature of PEM is also exemplified in their participation with local charities. They have partnered with another church to form the “Welcome Table,” where they feed the homeless in New Brunswick. They also conduct food drives, give scholarships to students at Franklin High School, and run hoodie drives where they give out warm clothes to homeless people during wintertime. Not only do members give financially, but they also give their time and efforts for creating worship experiences. The children’s pastor, Pastor Hyun, was commended for their initiative in organizing meetups, packet pick-ups, and putting together an interactive worship experience that kids love. Furthermore, worship is considered an integral part of PEM, and they have been blessed to have key members that stepped up to make livestreaming services seamless and professional. Their worship team is gifted, but more importantly, they create a space where people can invite the Holy Spirit into their hearts. As one member succinctly described, “we strive for excellence in music, but also candor and vulnerability in worship.”

As Praise Presbyterian Church moves forward, they hope to continue reaching out to those members who are on the fringes, as well as others in their community. They are not content to remain complacent or as they are, but instead they want to put forth effort into building their relationships not only with Jesus Christ, but also their family and community. Their growth in numbers demonstrates that their unconventional and bold methods are working, and I would even argue that they are able to be more intimate compared to other Korean congregations because of their willingness to defy and eliminate what are considered traditional staples. By removing social and hierarchical barriers, they can form close and strong relationships with one another that are genuine, comfortable, warm, and inviting. With these bonds as the foundation of their ministry, the church can develop a strong theology of worship, right fellowship with God and one another, and reach out to the world around them and share their love, reverence, and passion for the Lord.